Baseball Playoff Predictions

So October finally rolled around, and just when everyone's had enough baseball for the season, we've got some more baseball. This time it's baseball that doesn't count, because it doesn't reflect our fantasy teams, but it's exciting nonetheless. Scott's White Sox snuck in, all the Red Sox fans here are happy, Billy's Mets sucked hard down the stretch as hoped and expected, and the Rays winning a World Series is finally a comfortable thought with everyone.
If you google search "Mets fan", these are the first four image results:

Sad Mets fan #1

Sad Mets fan #2 Naive Mets fan who doesn't realize that they're going to break
his heart just the same next season.

Billy.

So if the Mets are out, who's a lock to win it all? Right now there's a 50% chance the team will be from Los Angeles or Chicago (unless you take into account that the Dodgers are dog shit, in which case it's 37.5%). There's a 25% chance the team will have "Sox" in their name, an 87.5% chance Scott will be sad with the outcome, and an 8% chance Eli Manning will be named MVP. My picks for the divisional rounds:

American League

Tampa Bay defeats Chicago White Sox in 4 games.
I'm jumping all over the Artist Formerly Known as the Tampa Bay Devil Rays bandwagon for the postseason. Lots of feel-good aspects about the team, and they're playing like they want to win it. Chicago's got them in experience and expectations, but I think the Rays are going to grind out some wins against a White Sox team that barely squeezed into the postseason.

Boston defeats LA Angels in 3 games.
Sometimes story lines just feel like they have to work out. I see the Red Sox overpowering the Angels in the divisional series to set up an AL East Championship Series. The rivalry built among the two teams ought to make that an interesting series. It's like Boston's the old fighter who's paid their dues, and this crazy talented young guy named Ray wants to step into the ring. After a great regular season, it's still hard to see Tampa Bay as a team that's for real, and nothing will give them more credibility than delivering a KO to Boston in the ALCS. As long as my divisional predictions are correct, you can already guess my ALCS prediction.

Expect to see these two teams duking it out in the ALCS, but duking it out in the
figurative sense. I mean, they could duke it out in the literal sense, cause they do
it all the time, but I'm talking figurative here.

National League

Chicago Cubs defeat LA Dodgers in 3 games.
If I could change any rule in baseball, it would be this: If 3 or more teams in your league have better records than you but don't make it to the playoffs, your division is officially a joke and you must forfeit your playoff spot.

I started writing this blog before the game happened, so to be fair I'll stick with my prediction of a Chicago sweep. It looks like it won't happen now, but I think the Cubbies will still be able to handle the Dodgers. Also, who would have predicted EVER that one day Joe Torre would be Manny Ramirez's manager, and neither would be on the Red Sox or Yankees?

I was totally going to photoshop Predator's head onto Manny Ramirez, but this is way better.
Manny + Gilligan hat + college skanks + random guy pooping himself out of happiness = joy

Philadelphia defeats Milwaukee in 5 games.
I like the Phillies, but I think the Brewers will grind this one out. Both teams seem about equal in talent, but Philadelphia just sounds good to me. Ben Sheets is done and most of the players look like they're out of steam. The Phillies could be surprising force and as far as I'm concerned have as good a shot as anyone right now of winning it all.