Worst Case Scenario

A couple weeks ago, I met up with my sister and her husband for a last-call drink at a bar near my place. We chatted, drank, and caught up a bit... a pleasant evening overall. Then, as we were saying our goodbyes, my sister smiled at me sweetly... flicked her wrist... and swung her purse directly into my balls. While I crumbled like a cheap card table under a certain friend of mine, she let out a short laugh and skipped away with my brother-in-law. Really, I should have seen it coming.

That's really the best way I can explain how Super Bowl XLII felt. Just as I had let my guard down after my sister and I getting along so well as adults the past few years... leaving myself wide open for such a stomach-churning ball tap... the Patriots (and Sox) success in the past decade caused me to let my guard down, forgetting that being a lifetime Boston sports fan means you're always vulnerable to an out-of-nowhere blunt force blow to the testes. The guys out there know the feeling I'm talking about... that hollow, helpless, sick feeling in your stomach that feels like it will never go away.

So this morning all I can think of is that, if after I recovered from my sister's deftly placed purse swing, just as I was getting back to my feet and preparing myself to walk away, she had ran up and steel-toed me in the kidney.... that would be the equivalent of Brady's knee buckling yesterday. Just as we, as Patriots fans, finally felt healed enough to put the past behind us and start the season with new optimism... this next blow came so swift and so early that we didn't even cry out in pain. We just winced, shook our heads, and stared vacantly at each other.

My dad was at the game, and asked me to call when I heard any updates. After that ticker came crawling across the screen, I called him and told him the news... "It looks like an ACL, he's probably done for the year." What worried me the most was that my father, who is never at a loss for words, came back with such a short and emotionless answer. "Well, I guess now we'll find out how good they really are. Thanks for calling, I'm glad it was you that told me." Then good night, and the conversation was over. Maybe it was that churning stomach feeling that kept him from wanting to talk longer, but the whole situation made me uncomfortable.


That's all I can really put into this right now, I'll be back with more about week 1 later, including how I'll be talking myself out of believing this is the end for the 2008 Pats. Keep your heads up, everyone... and don't forget to ice those balls.


EDIT:
Might as well get these up before the games start, even though they will help nobody. Just want to get them on record...

Vikings @ Packers (EVEN)
This game has big implications in the NFC. Green Bay and Minnesota have been looked at as the favorites to win the North, but with Chicago stunning Indy last night there's even more pressure to get an early win in the division. Both teams are really tough on defense, and both have huge potential on offense... but I'm gonna stick with Purple Jesus and say the Vikes win, 24-21.
Fantasy Love: Adrian Peterson, Ryan Grant, Greg Jennings
Fantasy Hate: Tavarius Jackson, Chester Taylor, Sidney Rice

Broncos @ Raiders (+1.5)
Another division battle, but this one's much less interesting. Most people will be watching to see if Run DMC will be the next ADP, and if the Broncos offense can get in rhythm without Brandon Marshall. I'll be tuning in to see if Ronald Curry will catch any passes or if I'm a total moron for starting him on my fantasy team. I've gone back and forth on this one, but I'll go with the home team and the better running game... let's say Oakland, 17-14.
Fantasy Love: Run DMC, Huggy Bear Jr., Tony Scheffler
Fantasy Hate: JaMarcus Russel, Jay Cutler, Darrel Jackson, Eddie Royal, Ronald Curry :(